'It's Mountains,' Says Divine Being
THE HEAVENS AND THE EARTH—The Lord our God, Divine Creator and Ruler
of the Universe, announced Wednesday that He considered mountains, not
mankind, to be far and away the most impressive thing He had ever
brought into being.
Calling the selection "not at all challenging" to make and "kind of a
no-brainer," the deity explained that while He felt the human species
was a good creation and worthy of praise, a human being simply paled in
comparison to the sheer awesomeness of a snowcapped 20,000-foot
mountain.
"Mountains, above all else, are undoubtedly my most splendid
creation," God proclaimed. "Mountains are incredibly tall. They are also
miles wide and are filled with millions upon millions of tons of earth.
These facts alone make them objectively more impressive than human
beings."
- The rest at The Onion
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