Saturday, July 21, 2012

God Admits Humans Not Most Impressive Creation

'It's Mountains,' Says Divine Being

 

THE HEAVENS AND THE EARTH—The Lord our God, Divine Creator and Ruler of the Universe, announced Wednesday that He considered mountains, not mankind, to be far and away the most impressive thing He had ever brought into being.

Calling the selection "not at all challenging" to make and "kind of a no-brainer," the deity explained that while He felt the human species was a good creation and worthy of praise, a human being simply paled in comparison to the sheer awesomeness of a snowcapped 20,000-foot mountain.

"Mountains, above all else, are undoubtedly my most splendid creation," God proclaimed. "Mountains are incredibly tall. They are also miles wide and are filled with millions upon millions of tons of earth. These facts alone make them objectively more impressive than human beings."

- The rest at The Onion

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